KK WISDUMBS

Do you ever feel like you’re holding onto your past life for dear life?

Like… for dear life.

God’s been growing you because you actually chose growth. You want growth, which is great because not everybody does. Some people think there’s nothing wrong with them. They think everybody else is the problem, and that’s fine for them.

But when you’re someone who seeks answers, who wants growth, it can be painful during the process to notice the shifts. To see yourself changing. To realize growth has a backbone , growth accepts nothing less , growth can show you  what you once wanted isn’t even what you want anymore… and now you’re sitting there like—what do I even want now? 

Sometimes, no matter how much change there is in you , there’s still a little bit of residue from your past life that you just can’t give up, whether it’s a person, a habit, or a mindset—and that’s the one thing you’re still holding onto.

So now you’re stuck in this weird in-between, one hand holding onto that thing, while the other hand is trying to pull you into your future of greatness.

And the hard  part is you know exactly what you have to do.

You just can’t do it.

Or you don’t want to do it.

That’s fear.

Because your fear will start talking real loud right here: 

“What if I don’t like what’s next?”

“What if I miss what I had?”

“What if I made all this progress just to regret it?”

I feel that because I’ve never liked change. I’ve feared it too.

I’ve been eating the same breakfast for like 20 years, an Eggo with peanut butter and syrup every morning, period. Same protein bars, same dinners. I do the same thing because it’s familiar, it’s comfortable and safe . I know what to expect. 

Ive stayed in an unhealthy place for too long because it was familiar and chose the comfort  of someone else’s over the comfort of my own. 

Something  new is unknown, and I wonder what if I won’t like it? What if I wish I was where I used to be? What if I miss that old life, or that old thing, or even that same breakfast choice?

But whenever you stay in what’s comfortable, you’ll never fully be happy. Because doing something new is always more exciting than sitting in a place of familiarity. Taking risks, trying new places it gives you experiences. You may have fear, but it’s also exciting. It gives you a chance for a new direction.

 I always resort back to that picture of the little girl, she’s holding her tiny teddy bear behind her back, hiding it, while God is standing in front of her holding a huge teddy bear behind His back, saying, “Let go.”

And she says, “But I love it.”

That’s the whole point.

She’s clinging to something small, something she’s attached to, something that feels safe… while something so much bigger is right in front of her, waiting but she can’t receive it because her hands are full.

That may be you. 

And I get it, we’ve been disappointed. I know I have. I’ve let go of things I thought were right, felt like it was what God wanted me to do, and still didn’t see the fruit of that trusting or choice . I’m like hello where is that big freaking teddy bear ? The fruit !!?

But what I had to learn is, it was never about the fruit.

It was about the obedience.

Because you’re never going to feel peace living in disobedience. You’re never going to feel aligned holding onto something God is asking you to release.

And the hard truth is you’re scared to let it go because it was accepted in your old life. But your new life won’t accept that. The growth, the new version of you it can’t go there. It was accepted in your old self, but the new version of you has higher standards, higher expectations.

So let it die.

Let it die, every part of your past self that isn’t aligned, that can’t come with you into what’s next.

Let it die, not because it was all bad, but because it’s not where you’re going.

Because there’s no peace in indecision.

There’s no joy in constantly looking back.

Don’t you think God has better for you?

Don’t you want better for yourself?

Then trust it.

Let it die.

Let go of what you thought you were supposed to be so you can receive who you were actually called to be.

So you can move into higher places, so your garden can be watered, so you can bear fruit.

So much so that one day, you won’t even look back at whatever it was that you were so scared to let go of.

Do something different.

Go somewhere new.

Change your routine.

Try a different breakfast.

Talk to a stranger.

Because that one thing you’re holding onto to whatever that is?

It’s  the only thing keeping you from fully stepping into what you’ve been praying for.

What is pushing you to the next level?

Let it go.

Let it grow.

Let it die have a cry and trust without needing to know why.

-KKwisdumbs